PROFESSIONAL SPORT A TARGET FOR REFORM

If reports are to be believed, professional sports in the United Kingdom could soon change dramatically. Under considerable pressure from the various Local Councils and Political Correctness groups, The Football Association in particular is said to be considering numerous rule changes, which include the phasing out of substitutions (as it is discriminatory to the players leaving the field), banning the words "miss", "fail" and "lose" from broadcasts (as they may upset the players or team involved) and changing the sports name from football to the more accurate "Every part of the body but arm and hand ball".

A number of top flight clubs were contacted but all refused to comment.